Catchup post

Quickly:

I had my wisdom teeth removed in November and due to complications, was out of BJJ for about 4 months.

I've been back for about 3 or 4 weeks now.

I went to my first seminar and sat around too much.

My BJJ focus has changed: I'm in a weird stage where I'm trying to push myself more, but not so much I'm wasted. I get about 1/3 of my process from thinking and reflection and when I'm gassed it's difficult to keep up mentally or remember things later. I know I'll need to push through this in the future, but for the time being it works into my wheel house of:

I've been getting mashed on more, but it's OK - I'm learning a ton and am OK with not spazzing. I'm curious and defensive. I don't mind getting tapped so long as I got there authentically. I'd rather move in a technical way and get tapped than do something whacky and win. That said, I still do whacky stuff. I feel like a dope for not being able to excute what we've just trained in after-class sparing sessions.

Watching my breath and timings. Control. Defense, technical transition and catch. I still explode sometimes.





Someone told me I should spaz more.

 Someone told me I was right on the cusp of unlocking BJJ "you're setting yourself up in ways which is making alarms go off in my head but failing to execute".

Someone told me that my brains were being used a lot - that I knew body positions and the mechanics. I guess 2+ years on the mats will do that!

A lot of compliments on my strength - I'm a skinny guy and people often say "you're a lot stronger than you let on" "best roll I've had in a while" - I feel bad for muscely or heavy people - the same compliments are complaints when applied against someone who has a larger body than me.

Back in the white

Posting from my phone:

I'm back in bjj. I took a leave of absence after having my wisdom teeth removed. Ive been back for three weeks now but haven't been training as often as I could until last week.

My forearm bones are giving me warning (yellow), I have a deep bruise on my leg, lots of little bruises all and my ego is taking a bit of a pounding as i catch back up. Stamina, technique, ego, and mindfulness.

I tried to reflect on what I've learned in the last week between open mat sessions, and came up blank, so I suppose that means I need to start keeping better records of what I've learned and gone over.